Trip

I might as well get something off my chest because I do not want another sleepless night.  So I read a lot over the summer and I have seen a lot of articles online assigning diagnoses to things - ADD, ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, PTSD, migraines, and so on.  Casual diagnoses, written well, helping the lay person self-diagnose.

Teaching, we get a lot of kids going through tough shit.  And they feel they have no way out.  And they "self-medicate."  What does this mean?  They use drugs to make themselves feel better.  With no one watching over them.  I understand the desperation behind this.  I do not begrudge any student trying whatever it takes to make oneself feel better.  I also understand adults trying whatever means they can find to help get out of their misery.  There are people who do have mental health issues or life issues that are so hard to get through.  Natural medication might not work.  Pharmaceutical medication might not work or be trusted.  Therapy can be really hard to get through if you even find the right match.  And for our students, not all of them feel comfortable going to our SAC, no matter how wonderful she is.

Now here is my beef.  Over the years, I have had more and more people declare what their ailment is and why that is the reason for behaviour or actions.  OK.  Who diagnosed you?  Oprah?  WebMD?  Some quack ready to rake in the money from your therapy?  I have had students declare their ADD was why they were being disruptive.  Honey, over 15+ years I have had tons of kids who have issues: ADD, ADHD, major depression, schizophrenia, dead parents, homelessness, war refugee status, Tourette's, you name it.  Do you really want to know how many of those kids were as selfishly disruptive as you?  None.  But by all means, self-diagnose and use that crutch.  Or better yet, find a doctor who will readily give you a bogus diagnosis.  (I wish I had a rare punk record for each bogus diagnosis we teachers see).

Now that I am getting out more and being more social, I am finding adults doing the same thing.  Adults claiming they are "depressed", have ADD, have anxiety, have PTSD.  Blah, blah, blah...  Fine, good for you.  Here's my issue...  Are you using your self-diagnosis as an excuse to treat others poorly, for being ignorant of others' feelings and needs? Are you self-medicating irresponsibly?   Adults who loudly declare their diagnoses annoy me.  You have a migraine and you are on the computer complaining?  I don't think so.  You have ADD when the topic doesn't interest you but have laser focus if it does?  OK.  You have PTSD?  Tell that to the lady who was raped or the veteran who wakes up screaming in the middle of the night, every night.  I have noticed that those who self-diagnose or readily accept a flip diagnosis from some quack are also the ones who loudly declare the righteousness of self-medicating - and doing so to excess.

Why does this bother me so much?  Several years ago I was diagnosed with a mental illness.  I have had this since I was in fourth grade.  The diagnosis did not come easily.  Medication was not quickly dispensed.  Thought and care went into this.  I have a hard time and very few people are privy to what exactly it is that I have.  I am vague because it is private.  It is not a badge of honour.  Every single person I know who is truly dealing with a diagnosis is like this - students and adults.  Some have tried using drugs to medicate, but as needed, not abused.  Some have had quacks run through wild diagnoses before finding a true diagnosis with a good doctor.  But here's the thing, they knew the BS.  They knew the false diagnoses seemed inaccurate.  We might be crazy, but we know our minds and know what is a correct or incorrect diagnoses.  We also know that this is no badge of honour.  We keep our issues quiet.  Those I know who flippantly claim these diagnoses seem to also use them as an excuse for being selfish, ignorant, and thoughtless.

Yes, many people are damaged.  Many of us have been through very hard things.  But those things do not necessarily lead to a mental illness diagnosis.  We live in an age where people think taking too many "selfies" should be a diagnosis in the next DSM.  There are depressive episodes and there is depression.  Two very different things.  Everyone wants a diagnosis.  For some it is an excuse to treat others in an offhand manner.  For others, it is a reason for abusing drugs (there is a difference between casual use and abuse).  I could go on.  When I get students who make these flip comments about their supposed diagnosis, I stop them and clarify ("No, you do not have ADD.  There is no documentation.  You are just being disrespectful and disruptive."  Stops them in their tracks and gets a smile from the others.) .  I do so because I know there might be a student who truly is dealing with an issue and hearing this flip declaration is hurtful.  I wish I could do the same with adults.